


Broken by Shame

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Angst, BDSM, Drama, Episode Related, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Orgy, Season/Series 02, Threesome, Unsafe Sex, What-If, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-05
Updated: 2007-12-05
Packaged: 2018-12-27 12:29:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12081084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: What if Justin hadn't been able to fend off Sap and his friends at the party in 214?  How would the boys deal with the guilt, the shame, the pain, and the repercussions?  Can Brian help Justin become Sunshine again?Review and let me know what you think!





	Broken by Shame

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

  
Author's notes: It's my first time writing- so I hope you enjoy! I'll probably be updating more over the holidays since I have off school.   


* * *

Justin felt alone and scared. He just wanted Brian to take him in his arms and comfort him in the way only Brian could, but he couldn’t tell Brian about last night. Brian would look at him with disgust or worse, superior pity. After all, hadn’t Brian told him the Sap was bad news? He should have known better. He should have listened to Brian. But he didn’t. He was selfish and stupid and now he was all alone. He couldn’t saddle Brian with this. He would just gently drift away. Brian would be better off than to be stuck caring for a stupid little slut. That was what Justin was wasn’t it? He had ignored Brian and sold himself to the Sap. He had been asking for it.

 

_“In fact, he said I could have the whole weekend, if I just went to some after hours party at his house”_

_“For what?”_

_“Some pretty boys there for decoration.”_

_“Who else is gonna to be there?”_

_“How should I know- his friends?”_

_“I can imagine what kind of friends he has. I can guess what kind of party he’s having. That guy’s a fuckin sleeze.”_

_“You don’t know him.”_

_“I know how you got to dance on the bar.”_

_“I let him blow me. Big deal.”_

_“I’ll give you $5,000.”_

_“What for?”_

_“That drawing.”_

_“It’s not for sale.”_

_“No, just you.”_

 

As Justin scratched manically at his flesh, trying to rid himself of the filth that was permanently ingrained into his flesh, a new thought stuck him. Shit! Had those guys used condoms? He had been too tweaked out to even notice. Why hadn’t he though of that before. Knowing the company that Sap kept, he was sure he had to have caught it. He couldn’t say it, even in his head. It made it too real, too certain. 

 

Justin felt ill. He heard a scream but it was alien to him as though it had not escaped his lips. Dizzy, disoriented and completely disgusted, he resolved to leave before Brian came home from work. He was short of breath and he recognized it as a panic attack. Voices kept replaying in his head, 

 

_“You look kinda thirsty. Have a sip”_

_“Thanks”_

_“Hey, you haven’t seen my place. Come on. I’ll show you around… He looks like he’s having a good time. You ever been in a sling? Oh you’d love it. Come on, why don’t you give it a try?”_

_“I don’t- I don’t want to”_

_“I think you’ll change your mind. My friends here will see to that.”_

 

He was wandering, desperately grasping for anything in reach. He vaguely remembered the loft door being opened, but he felt unsure of anything except for escaping. Escaping the memories. Escaping hurting the only person he really cared about: Brian. Justin felt a sudden impact and then only darkness.

 


End file.
